I started to write a post on Thursday, I was shoehorning that writing into a busy morning. There were lots of other things I needed to be doing. So I downed tools and stopped. My life is all about slow living but at the moment it feels so far removed from that as I try to keep many balls in the air.
Over the winter months my life has a wonderful rhythm to it, this winter my children really enjoyed doing a project during Advent. They enjoyed it so much that I started another one at the beginning of the new year and now were are doing a third. Cameron told me this week that he loved the projects we have been doing and can we do Dinosaurs next. This home edding thing involves adapting as the children grow and change their needs change too. Whereas Cameron was happy to do his own thing for years now he is looking to me much more. Alice joins in when she wants to, and more and more is asking to do things too, but usually they need to be at her level. This is involving more and more planning on my part, a lot more researching and thinking, I am loving it but it takes time.
I have always struggled to make friends. All my life. At school I tended to keep to the edges, not quite sure if I wanted to be in the middle and baffled about how to get there. This carried on after I left home and spent time in higher education and working. Much of the work I did in my twenties involved short contracts (up to nine months) that necessitated me moving around, a lot. I suspect subconsciously this was a protection my part, that friends thing still a mystery. It has taken having children and starting to home ed to finally feel that I am part of something. I read much about the blogging community before I started this one. I thought it sounded like fun, but I have still always felt on the edge. I know that you have to work hard to be part of any community but I have never been able to find the 'right' one online. These past few weeks I have really reduced the amount of time I have been spending online and it showed.
Now that it is Spring and the weather is warming up, well hopefully it will, my garden takes up time. I need to be out there tending it if we are to have any hope of producing food of our own. In the winter I don't replace that activity with something else so that time has to taken out of my day.
So my priorities needed examining and much thinking has been done. I have made two big decisions this week and one is that I am no longer going to be writing this blog. This will be my last post. I would like to thank all of you who have visited and read what I have written here. A huge thank you to those that have commented, the lovely positive comments and support has been wonderful.
I will miss you all.
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This is not a goodbye, if you would like to stay in touch email me your address and I will use old fashioned snail mail!